My Inability To Stop Myself From Loving You
by sctwilightvampwolfgal
Summary: Arthur really does hate himself by falling under her charms yet he's always known her far too well, and she doesn't realize how much he cares regardless of all of this time. Nyo!France, Nyo!Spain, Nyo!Prussia.


It was stupid, he knew, to get involved with her.

She went through relationships like women changed clothes.

She broke hearts yet Arthur was drawn to her like a moth to a flame.

Francine's friends were much better choices to fall for as Antonia had been dating Lovino for years and Jules only had eyes for one person; that person happened to be taken already however.

Despite the better choices in terms of having a solid, long lasting romance with any other person than Francine including her friends, Arthur didn't want them or anyone else; all he wanted was Francine even though it hurt far too much sometimes.

Arthur wasn't drawn to the thought of changing Francine's ways; he was just drawn to her.

He loved her despite her ways, not because of them,

It really did hurt loving a woman like her, but he just couldn't help himself nor could he stop himself.

* * *

Francine smirked confidently as she flirted with Arthur playfully as in not actually meaning a word that she was saying.

His heart broke as he flirted back; when she kissed him, he felt as if his whole world had shifted in a nervous joy and an eager anticipation of the the moment and what may happen afterwards.

He kissed back despite the fact that he knew that she didn't mean it.

He knew that her heart, her passion, and her were never meant to be his yet he couldn't resist savoring these kisses and many more of them.

He knew that he was only worsening his future heartbreak yet in these far too brief moments, he could pretend that she saw him the way that he saw her and that she cared.

Arthur could imagine that every kiss of his given to her and every touch placed upon her skin just so sent a passionate fire through her veins and latched her on to the addiction of him, Arthur Kirkland, like he felt when they kissed and explored.

He truly did love her, and he hated himself for that and his inability to hate her.

Arthur hated himself for the fact that he knew that she came to him in between relationships and her normal flings or one night stands as he was far too willing to kiss her yet he also knew at the same time that another part of himself wished that he wouldn't do so.

He hated the fact that as soon as she touched him in anyway or kissed him that he was lost and gone to that moment and to her.

His imaginary shackles kept him tied to a love that would never return his love and had no desire or knowledge of that love.

Yet Arthur let the kiss capture away his thoughts and drown any bitter after taste of his self loathing and inner frustration; he let the passion consume him of her touch and of her lips even though he knew that he'd regret it once she left or shown signs of not being as smitten with her long lasting friend and an easy to seduce one at that.

Surely, her other friends never craved or wanted her this way and anyone else that she seduced shouldn't fall guilty to her charms though she was fully capable of it.

He hated the fact that his heart was lost before it could grow in love to someone other than a seductress such as her yet she prided herself on love and knew nothing of his feelings for her.

Arthur loved her too much to break her heart in this, so he quieted any thoughts of verbally revealing what his heart knew to allow it to enter and take over her mind.

He could at least pretend that the feelings were mutual and that heartbreak wasn't waiting around the corner like a long term friend; may be it had long grown used to it's power over him.

Arthur hated the sort of poison a woman like her seemed to manifest and the way that she tempted his heart, mind, body, and soul.

He was only human and clearly far too weak to escape her charms.

Arthur loved her far too much despite everything that she'd unknowingly done to him and all that she'd purposely done.

He'd never been able to stop after all these years as distance and significantly less communication, dating someone, and being far too close never eased his heart's joy and longing to be near her.

The British man was lost to her undeniable charm that came from having known her for far too many years for this to fade and heal him.

I love yous were sometimes best unspoken when they could break or damage a heart, so he held his back for the rest of his life though he knew that the heartbreak caused from loving her would never cease all of his days.

'I love you, but I could never tell you so, and it's become too much for me, my dear love and friend.'


End file.
